Dear Ex, Thank You For Breaking Up With Me

“I am attracted towards a colleague of mine and I think things are not working between us. It’s over…”

You said this hurriedly as your new found love was waiting on the other side of the call. And just like that within a minute, everything was over. 

I felt my world crumbled, I was devastated then but I am happy now. Little did I know that I messed up with the foundation of my so-called little world. I remember telling you like a little child that you can keep us both and I feel like slapping myself for stooping so low. Back then, everything felt black but all that now I can see around myself are colours. 

Dear ex, thank you for breaking up with me because you taught me to love myself more. 

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Everyone you meet is a part of your journey, but not all of them are meant to stay in your life. Some people are just passing through to bring you gifts; either they’re blessings or lessons.Everyone you meet is either a blessing or a lesson.

Roy T. Bennett

For me, you were a combination of two. 

I am blessed to have wonderful memories with you and I am thankful to you for teaching me the much-needed lessons. I want to thank you today whole-heartedly for the five lessons that you taught me and I guess it’s time to share it with the world. 

1. Relationships will come and go, but your degree and skills will stay with you 

Never ever compromise your professional life for your relationships. Your professional life helps you to stay independent and gives you the power of confidence and accomplishments. If you are in a bubble world thinking no matter how many times you fail, your partner will be always there with you, it’s time for you to wake up. Do not be in that situation where you actually get to test your partner for the support. Buckle up and start working on yourself and don’t end the struggle until you are proud of yourself. Plus, do not ever depend on anyone else for support. Learn to support yourself, you do not need a shoulder to cry on. 

2. Being cheated on is not as bad as you think

My boyfriend cheated on me. It damaged me to an extent that I started believing that there was something wrong with me. I guess I forgot that his infidelity is an indication of who he was, and in no way it defines me. If it ever happens to you, do not doubt yourself because there is nothing wrong with you. Oh! Did I tell you that his infidelity actually gave me a better perspective for my future relationships? Also remember, the fact that your partner cheated indicates that he/she always had the potential to cheat and if that person is out of your world now, the universe has actually done a favour for you. It just saved you from a huge burden of pain in the future. Dear ex, if I was still with you, trust me, I could have never trusted you. And I cannot imagine living a life with so much of doubt and fear in my mind. 

3. Pay attention to the red flags

Many red flags were flashing right in front of my eyes and I ignored them thinking it is just the work taking a toll on him. But it is never about the work, it is all about the priorities. Keep your eyes and ears open and do not ignore the red flag. Talk with each other, communication is the key. 

4. Cultivate yourself

Once I was alone, I began walking in the path of self-discovery. I learned to cultivate myself-my hobbies, my interests. In the process, I learned my own strength and yes, it feels wonderful. 

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5. Life goes on

The pain eventually fades away. It might look hard in the beginning but it is totally possible. Life goes on and you learn to cope up with the things. And you realise that things are not as bad as it looked. And every end is the start of a new beginning. 

Dear ex, 

Thank you,

For the realisation that I am I stronger than I think, 

Thank you,

For showing me that everything does truly happen for a reason. 

Life was beautiful back then and it is beautiful right now. It’s just that for a moment, I mistook a blessing for a curse. Dear ex, your memories are still there but now it doesn’t invoke any feeling. Because you were gone, it was possible for me to begin a new chapter in my book of my life.